Say my Name

In the recent past, exotic traditional names  seems to have become a thing. I see a lot of parents coming up with really exotic traditional names for their children.

I don’t think this was always the case, at least not for some generations past. 

So considering this, I always thought my parents did well because for their first three kids, they managed to come up with what I consider as unique and cool names, at least for their generation: Chinemerem, Nkeonyezuruya and Udoamaka.

So I was truly disappointed that all they could come up with when I was born was Uchechi. I mean as far as Igbo names go, it doesn’t get more common. It’s so common that it is answered both by males and females. Truly disappointing 😭😭😭

But then I received understanding 🧐and insight 🤓 about what my name stands for, and I have keyed into it so much that nothing else will do now.

So please feel free to say my name: Uchechi - God’s will, The Mind of God.

May his will reign supreme above all things for me and mine, and for you and yours.

Wishing you a joyous and peaceful Christmas celebration.

Photocredit: manfredsteger @Pixabay

Read More

Miss the Hugs.

 

2020, the year of lockdown, isolation and social distancing.

Having spent almost all year living through computer, tablet and phone screens either for work or catching up with family, I am completely zoomed and screened out.

Looking back on this year, I realize what I have missed most is physical contact with people. I am a hugger, always have been, and not being able to express my self through physical contact has taken a toll.

Looking forward to a more physical and less social distanced 2021, until then let’s keep keeping safe.

Photo credit: Immo Wegman on Unsplash.

Read More

All Change Please

Many of us have experienced being on a bus or train or plane which we boarded because it was going to a particular destination, which was either our final destination or en-route our desired destination.   

Partway into the journey we are told the bus or train or plane can no longer continue to that destination, for whatever reason, and everyone is expected to disembark and find an alternative means of getting to their desired destination.

Sometimes the alternative is provided, sometimes not. More often than not the change comes with an adverse impact on our time and our resources, both financial and otherwise, and bucketloads of inconvenience.

Our typical response when this happens is to rant. I certainly do so and do not mince words while expressing my displeasure, sometimes using words that are against my personal principles.

But what I don’t do is refuse to get off the bus, train or coach; because whether I like it or not, or whether I accept it or not, that bus or train or plane is no longer capable of getting me to my destination. So while ranting and expressing my displeasure, at the same time I am already looking for alternative options; because though that path or route may no longer be valid, my destination still is and I must keep going anyway and anyhow possible until I get there.

Of course there are occasions when a mishap on our journey may cause us to rethink the entire journey; but once the conclusion is reached that the destination remains valid, then we must find a way to proceed.

So why do we not respond the same way when life throws curve balls at us and causes or forces us to make a change? Why do we stay stuck, immobile and refuse to see that change is required and we must make that change because quite frankly that is the only option available to us?

So many of us are stuck in things, in  situations and in experiences that are at a dead end. Though we had intended that those things or situations or experiences will take us to a desired destination, for whatever reason something has changed and that thing or situation or experience is no longer capable of getting us to our desired destination. 

But rather than read the situation and make the required change to get us back on track, we stay stuck. Like remaining on the platform of a train we’ve been told is not going any further, or in the lounge of a plane that has been grounded. No matter how long we stay there, the outcome will not change. We might as well have boarded a bus or train or plane that is going nowhere. 

By all means rant and vent if that helps you express your displeasure and get things off your chest, but most importantly get back on track. Get back on a route or a path that gets you to your destination because though you may have lost time, though it may cost a bit more physically, mentally, psychologically and financially, when you get to your destination it’ll be all worth it.

May God bless us all.

Read More

Doing Life Alone.

 

Photo credit: Anthony Tran on Unsplash.

Not everyone who is alone is lonely, some have chosen to be alone and would have it no other way. But when it’s a state that you have not necessarily chosen for yourself or would not like to be in, it is a struggle. A BIG ONE.

Loneliness is a war, one of many fought in the battle of life. It is intense in its relentlessness. It seeks to draw you into its abyss and if you allow it to succeed, it’ll chew you up and spit your carcass out. 

I wish at this point I could give a ‘formula’, something ‘magical’ that you could do to miraculously make the feeling disappear. But I do not know of any, don’t even know if any such thing exists. 

All I know is that when loneliness comes knocking and seeks to pull me into its abyss, I fight against it with everything I’ve got. I refuse to let it get the better of me, to pull me down, to faze me or wear me out. I fight to pull myself up and out because I believe that it is a phase. And with all phases, it too shall pass.

Read More

The Ultimate Giveaway.

Picture Credit: 123RF.com

Giveaways are now a common feature on social media. Not even sure how it became a ‘thing’, but I suppose it’s a guaranteed way of growing one’s social media following as these giveaways are often with a pre-requisite that you follow a particular handle or account or subscribe to a particular channel. Also not everyone who meets the criteria receives the giveaway because there is a random selection for ‘winners’.

When we think about all this level of uncertainty and probability, isn’t it nice to know that there is a giveaway that is guaranteed?

Grace is the only guaranteed giveaway, God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Christ has already paid the price for this giveaway, all we need to do is collect. 

But we cannot collect without indicating interest and the way we indicate interest is by accepting Christ as Lord and Savior. This is the only qualification required. The same way no one can dream about winning the lottery if he hasn’t at least purchased a ticket or being given one, so also the ultimate giveaway requires us to confess with our mouth that Jesus is the Christ and believe it with our hearts.

By all means partake of and enjoy the many giveaways that happen on social media, if that is your thing; but it will make no sense to miss out on the one guaranteed giveaway, The Ultimate Giveaway.

God bless us all.

Read More

Pleasure in Little Things. Episode 1

Photo credit: Reiseuhu from Unsplash

My morning wake up song. 

Gosh, it’s been ages I posted on this blog. I definitely need to do better so I’m thinking of changing direction a little bit. Rather than think of ‘big things’ to write about so that I sound a little bit intelligent, focus on the many little things that often go unnoticed and/or unsaid and leave the big things to the intellectuals. 

So today I want to share what happens to me most mornings. More often than not, I wake up with a song in my head and that song will become my companion for the rest of the day (i.e. repeat mode on my phone or my Amazon echo device). It could be a pick me up song, or a calm me down song, or just a motivational song to ease me into the day. Because music is my go to anytime any day, whatever song comes to me is always apt for wherever my head and my heart is at that time. 

I suppose I am not alone in this, who else experiences this? Please share. By the way my wake up song today is ‘Christ is Enough’ by Hillsong (https://youtu.be/teUxQpnhezY). This one got me dancing. Enjoy and make time to enjoy the little things.

Read More

Lockdown, and Remembering Mr L

When I moved into my house I inherited some furniture, paintings, a high maintenance garden and a shed full of DIY tools. I tried to get the solicitor to get it all cleared out before I moved in but it wasn’t done, so it was left to me to sort out.

The furniture and paintings were easy to take care of, I kept those I wanted and sent the rest to a charity shop. My plan was to turn the garden into a low maintenance outdoor space but to start with, I just had it cleared out. The shed was a bit tricky. My plan was to get rid of it lock, stock and barrel as my level of DIY is minimal or almost non-existent. But even I could see the value of tools in my inherited shed and that it would be a DIY lover’s haven. So I let it be, until I would have the time to take care of it one way or another.

A couple of months ago I had spoken to some friends, offering barbecue and beer in exchange for labour clearing out my garden and the shed. I even offered to throw in one tool of their choice from my overstocked shed. Alas corona virus happened and brought with it a lockdown. My friends couldn’t come around to help and realizing there was not much to do during a lockdown weekend especially when the weather is nice, I decided to give it a go myself with help from my housemate.

As I sorted through the shed, I caught a glimpse into the life of Mr L, the man who had left behind all those things. I could see he was very much a handyman and realized some of the furniture I had inherited had been made right there in my shed. The garden I had taken apart without a second thought had been his haven and I found compost, some seedlings and flower food he had obviously planned to use. There was an unopened amazon parcel containing a part for an equipment I didn’t know what it is used for waiting to be fixed. There was wood and paint perhaps to make another piece of furniture.

As I went through all these things I discovered a little about Mr L, a man I had never known. And I felt sorry that I had planned to get rid of all that stuff with perfunctory thought. So while cleaning out the shed I agreed with Mr L that I was going to keep some of the tools and start to try my hand at some DIY. And who knows, hubby dearest when he shows up may be a lot more into it and he’ll have a variety of tools to use to his heart’s content.

As I closed the shed door I thought I would  start my DIY foray by painting the shed. That should make Mr L happy.

Read More

When you don’t know, but you know.

The parish priest at mass today just got back from Italy yesterday (and no, we didn’t all run out of church when he told us 😁), but he mentioned how much uncertainty he had experienced in the past week because while in Italy he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to make it back to the UK as scheduled. The corona virus situation was changing so rapidly in Italy, he didn’t know if something would happen that would cause him to be quarantined. He was already thinking of how much he had to do and how much he’ll need to reschedule if for some reason his plans had to change as a result of the situation with the virus.

He finally got on a plane heading to London and while in transit, the plane experienced such severe turbulence that he started thinking again to himself all that would happen, or not happen, if he didn’t arrive home as planned. But he did get home on schedule and as planned and he shared in retrospect if he had known for certain what the outcome of these two scenarios were going to be, he would have spent less or no time thinking or worrying about them and definitely no effort trying to reorganize his schedule just in case he got delayed.

This certainty in knowing the outcome, despite the uncertainty and even turbulence in going through the process is akin to ‘When you don’t know, but you know’.

Hearing Fr’s experience reminded me of so many whom I know who are waiting for, working towards or looking forward to something in anticipation. How sometimes the uncertainty and turbulence in the process can cause you to doubt that you will arrive at the expected outcome, you will get that which you have waited on, worked for or sought after.

So to myself and to all those who this might resonate with I say these words of encouragement: We may know nothing about the process, it may be fraught with uncertainty, difficulty, lack of clarity, pain, sweat and tears; that’s okay. Because we know what we know, we know the outcome. And the only reason we can be so confident about the outcome is because “We know in whom we have believed, in whom we have put our trust “ 2 Timothy 1:12; and we know the plans he has for us are “plans to bring us prosperity and not disaster, plans to bring about the future we hope for” Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11‬ ‭GNBDK‬‬.

So with confidence and certainty in the outcome we can go through the process, turbulent and uncertain though it may be. For though we may not know; but we know.

God bless us all.

Read More

Course Correct

Everyone makes mistakes, of varied proportions. Some are easily glossed over, some are game changers and have life changing consequences. 

That a mistake was made is nothing to dwell excessively on, what is most important is what has happened afterwards; the ability for one to ‘Course Correct’. No matter how grave or serious a mistake was or is, it’s gravity can be heightened depending on the actions that follow from it.

The aim is to learn from it, dwell on it no more and move on. That is what you owe yourself.

Of course there are people who, no matter how much you have course corrected, will always refer to your mistake. No matter how much you have moved on, their aim is to take you back. In their minds, there is no differentiation between you and the mistake. They never see you as what you have become or trying to become, they only see the mistake which you have left behind. 

You do not owe anything to those who are incapable of seeing, appreciating and supporting your ‘Course Correction’. If they are still able to see your ‘Red light’, it means they have stayed behind you. So leave them behind as you move on. 

Read More

Blessing.

There are some significant events in one life that usually necessitates the taking of a new name. Some artistes take on new names to fit with their artistic personas, some persons change their names when they get married, taking on the name of their spouse to show that they have a changed identity. Catholics are usually invited to take a new name when they are baptized, confirmed or receive the sacrament of Holy Orders. It is advised that the name reflects something about their new journey, in most cases the saint whose life they would like to emulate. These names, once taken, stay with you in some cases for life; so some thought goes into its choice as this is a big deal. 

I was baptized as an infant, and the name I was given (or so I thought) was Elizabeth; in fact I thought it was Elizabeth Mary and I carried this belief all of my young life. I felt very privileged to have those names and had grown very fond of them, until I was preparing for confirmation which required me to submit my baptismal card (a card that contains information about sacraments one has received such as name of candidate, parents and godparents names, parish where the sacrament was administered, etc) and saw something to the contrary.

I was shocked to see my baptismal name in the card was ‘Blessing’, and not what I had thought all along. I thought to myself: what saint have I been named after, and who even names their child an unimaginative name like Blessing (yes, I used to be a name snob)? 

I was unhappy for months, felt like I had been scammed for so many years, and of course my immediate action was to then take Elizabeth as my confirmation name to make it ‘official’.

Several years after, and having overcome so many trials and tribulations, I have learnt to embrace the name BLESSING. I now know that it was not given in error, even though truth be told I don’t think my parents remembered they gave me that name because they never called me that. The name ‘BLESSING’, which needs no interpretation, and my native name UCHECHI, which means ‘God’s Will’, truly embody the story of my life; what I’ve been through, where I am now and where I am going.

So everyday I declare what these names stand for over my life.

You too could do the same. So what does your name mean? Is it something that embodies you and something you can embrace fully?

Some people ask ‘what’s in a name?’ I would answer everything. 

The same way artistes are careful about choosing their stage names, and business owners think carefully about what they want their companies to be called because it represents an identity, a brand; in the same way we should care about our names, what we are called, our identity.

 And if it turns out that your name does not represent you or for some reason you just haven’t connected with it despite giving it time, then there is an option to change it.

End of the day, even though your name might not be blessing, it should still feel like a source of blessing to you.

Stay blessed.

Read More